This is a story of double betrayal… I cannot pinpoint the exact moment that my husband of 30 years and father of my 3 children, began his affair with this woman. She had always been in our lives in some form or another. For years, she cleaned our family boat. I always admired how hard she worked; she was a single mother and I always found it so admirable that she never dated or brought men around her young daughter, little did I know, she was sleeping with my husband! I feel like a fool because I never suspected. I am breast cancer survivor, when I was diagnosed 11 years ago, my husband was emotional and devastated, he was by my side every moment, I honestly married my best friend and never felt us to have anything other than a wonderful marriage as well as being blessed with 3 amazing children and now a newborn granddaughter. || Anyway…. time went on and four years ago, we opened a small business, two years in, we needed new management, my husband suggested we hire Mildred, I agreed because I had always known her to have a strong work ethic and thought her to be extremely trustworthy. I welcomed her and her daughter into our home at Easter, included and invited them to our daughter’s wedding, she was one of the first people I hugged when I found out I was going to become a grandmother…stupid me, I actually considered her a friend! We worked together, she looked at me and smiled in my face everyday, we spoke on the phone for hours with regard to the business and worked closely together. She began getting close to my youngest son, who loved working in the store after school. || Last summer, while on a fishing trip with his dad, my son looked over and noticed that his dad was texting back and forth with this woman, saying things like”I love and miss you more than you can possibly imagine” My son (16 at the time) was devastated! || He didn’t know what to do and felt caught in the middle. He held this inside for a month and finally was so upset, he called his older sister (my older daughter) who was pregnant at the time! My daughter called me and told me that I needed to talk to my son because he was so emotionally upset. I didn’t want either of my children upset, so I just played it off and said,”Oh, you know daddy and how friendly he is, I’m sure it’s nothing.” || Since then, my life has been a series of lies. I confronted her and she denied it at first, until she realized that I had copies of his phone calls and texts. My husband insists that he loves me and wants to keep our marriage and family together, at this point every time I look at him, all I see is a liar. If someone would have told me 5 years ago that any of this would be happening, I would have said they were crazy. But, here I am, caught up in this hell. || Leaving is easier said than done. I am not selfish like he and his mistress are. I understand that there is a ripple effect, and there is family here with children and now grandchildren. I don’t want my granddaughter to be born into cycle of brokenness and failure. When I took my vows, I took them seriously, better/worse, sickness/health, richer/poorer, good times and bad…. I come from a generation that believes when something is broken, you fix it, you don’t just throw away a lifetime of memories, traditions and relationships. || I hold my cheating louse of a husband 100% responsible for his deplorable actions, however, from the time she has known him, he was a married man with a family. She knew me and my children, and quite frankly, didn’t care. Every fiber of my being wants someone to just shake me and wake me from this nightmare! I feel as if someone came and pulled the rug out from under my life and I’ve been in a hellish free-fall with no happy ending in sight.